Birdhouse For Rent

For the love of Doodle Week.

Ha Ha, Your Momma Took Penicillin

Searching for old letters to illustrate my article at Inherited Values (yes, I need another website to write at, thank-you-very-much), I found this gem of a blog, Matrilineal, by Linda (a jackass owner), who is transcribing 15 years of previously unread family letters. Sadly I did not find any scans of the old letters (I just love looking at them; it's almost as good as holding them), but when you find entires like this one dated December 6, 1954, you can forgive nearly anything:

I was so scared and horrified when I read that you had taken penicillin. No wonder the doctor tested your heart. Don't ever take it again. After taking it several times it reacts on the heart and often causes death in a few minutes. Don't let any doctor give you any more of it.

Hank Didn't Mean To Give The Waitress The Finger

He was just no good with cameras.

Memo To Becky: Pray Or Get Off The Pot

When Becky got into the photobooth, she wasn't sure if it was a pretty potty or an unusual confessional. So she did both.

Todd Left To Get Liquid-Plumr

Because whenever Cindy filled the tub, there was always a clog afterwards.

Via eBay.

Who Said Brigitte Bardot Never Had A Cross Word?

The Taste Stays With You

Kitsch Kisses by kindnessofstrangers
See more Snark Stationery

Before Frosted Flakes...

Young Tony the Tiger just liked milk.



Clarolyte rubber squeaky toy by Alan Jay; from my vintage rubber toy collection.

Winter Would Come Too Quickly

Marta had barely recovered from that Easter bonnet, and now this.


Via Flickr.

Lucky Strikes

Now with new mirrored carton!


From Gillian Atkinson's photos at TEN.

When Andy Warhol Speaks

Everybody listens.


Andy Warhol, Edie Sedgwick, and Entourage, New York, 1965; Steve Schapiro photographer.

The Case Of The Pirate Fashion Photographer

I'm no Erle Stanley Gardner, or even one of the Brett Hallidays; but I'm pretty sure it was all the striped ties which caused male fashion photographer Marco to gauge his own eye out.


Via Flickr.

The Nightmare That Is Sandy Mac Underwear

The opposite of how I envision underwear sales, for I neither want sandy undies nor the word "Mac" associated with my butt.


And why would it be cute to see a toddler in his underwear skating on thin ice?

Via KnittingTogether.org.

"Do I sound like that?" "Yes."

Because I'm so loving the latest McDonald's Filet-O-Fish commercial (obsessively tracking down info on the jingle's creators), I had to stop and watch this one:

Three dollar signs for THAT??!?

marriedtothesea.com

Intro To The Dean Martin Show (April 1969)

Some-Bunny Ears Ursula Andress

New Year, New You: Workout With Dumbells

You can do it like Crawford...


I prefer Russell's method myself.

Annual Family Tradition

After eating a big holiday meal, it was customary for the men to go into the kitchen to cut the cheese. No one knew why Sara always went along.



Maybe it's cheese; maybe it's not (you can find out at Flickr). But then the food isn't really the issue now, is it.

No More Happy Families

Found via Kinsanity, this art collage by Mira Rudio.

Our Kids Asked To Be Left Alone, Please

A reminder-slash-warning at one of the local thrift stores to watch your children, or they "will be given an espresso and a free puppy".

Squirrel Found!

SQUIRREL FOUND! "Johnny C" over at A Hole In The Head had this on his fridge for a while, after meeting the creator, an underground comic artist. The webpage has a version big enough to print out and spread around your own little bubble of the world.

Think, Edward!

(from superpoop)

James Brown In National Geographic

Heh. Made you look. ...But if you read the text, it really could be him because "the Machiguenga refused to reveal their names; the men called this one Marino." So maybe James Brown traveled as Marino to avoid the crowds.

Pussy Doesn't Love The Canary For Its Song

An odd old postcard with an illustration of a creepy kid -- presumably "he" painted the saying on the wall.



Maybe the kid's only creepy for being on the card. Maybe you don't think he's creepy at all. But I'm pretty certain he's the 1920's version of a goth graffiti artist. But in any case, I found the vintage postcard well worth the $1.

Postmarked 1921; SB postcard number s.204.

Modern Woman Monday: What's In Your Fridge?

Just one of the many quirky, unique items available at the Kindness Of Strangers shop, a group in which I am just one of the quirky, unique artists -- but I didn't make this one; Slip of a Girl did. (People always think she's so sweet. She is, but she's also got her twisty side.)

If you don't see the works with art nudes, create an account at Zazzle, go to 'account settings', and set 'the maturity level' to R.

Why Other Countries Hate It When McDonald's Comes To Town

Kids in Japan beggin' for the toys in Happy Meals.



Photo from a 1986 National Geographic magazine.

Susan Has A Headache

What will stop it, once and for all?


OK, so this photo captioned "Until The Doctor Arrives" (from 1954's The Family Physician) is all about first aid treatment for poison, but just saying that would be far less fun.

Why Mom Never Let Us Play Billiards

Via CardCow.

Even After Years Of Studying Them

Betty never would understand boys.


Illustration from Making Words Work, 1942.

Urine Our Thoughts

And carpet.

Note card by Porterness, via XXBN.

Amanda Always Hated It When They Returned Her Hanky

Used.



Via LJ's Vintage Photo Community.

Slow Food Tray

By Design Glut.

Ham-Handed Harriet Had Trouble Hand-Tinting Photos

From Square America.

Who Invited The Chubby Girl? (Or, She Was Happier Because She Could Eat)

Via Flickr.

Climbing The Corporate Ladder Has Always Been Tough

And weird.



Via Vintage Photo Community.

They Quickly Learned To Keep The Knives Away From Susan

Via LJ's Vintage Ad Community (we're still crediting them, hoping they'll credit us with the stuff they score here).

UPDATE: Hey, StumbleUpon folks -- there's a lot more at KKC, so start at the beginning and get so dizzy with the delights that folks will need to keep the knives away from you too.

Someone Needs A Napkin

Via LJ's Vintage Ad Community -- someone there has been taking a lot of our scans lately, but not crediting us. :sigh:

Before Wonka, The Umpa Loompas Made Coats

Naturally, they would have to change the spelling of their names from Umpa Lumpa to Oompa Loompa.

Vintage ads for Umpa furs, via eBay (1 & 2).

Roller Coasters Of Love, Say What?

Even if you're not The Ohio Players, get a set from Words, Inc.

Let's Face It... A Slow Death Is Better?

You could be hit by a bus tomorrow, go on - have a fag!



We're not (just) making fun of the gay humor; the ad is queer no matter how you look at it.

How To Be a Super Secretary

Super-Secretaries aren't born on another planet nor created in the neutron fire of an atomic exposion -- no, they just know how to behave in the workplace:

See all the rules here.

Just Like A Man -- And A Woman

Just Like A Man was a Family Circle column by Byron Fish; the following appeared in the November 1964 issue of the magazine.

A boy can't learn too soon that in math, as in most subjects, there is a male and a female way to work things out. After a lesson in feminine-gender arithmetic my son figures that when it comes to higher powers of reasoning, men are squares.

First up, gender punctuation:

"You are inquiring into a mystery unsolved by man. From the time a female learns to write, she is convinced that exclamation points were invented to be used. She even feels they will go to waste unless they are put into sentences."

That's so not true!!

Regarding ellipsis...

The boy asks, "How about those dots in there?"

The father responds:

Dots sometimes are used for a specific purpose in the neuter, or masculine, gender. If you find a long row of them apparently just thrown in, they are feminine gender."

My husband would have a field day with this... He abhors my continual use of ellipsis...

I, in return, must counter by pointing out that this article is proof that everything is considered masculine unless noted as feminine (and that feminine is lower in status). I'm just sayin'...


"Men teachers probably are told during their training to allow for the more complicated punctuation by girl pupils." :sigh: I suppose I should just be happy there was no mention of retarded or intolerant women teachers.

Then again... no mention of female teachers is rather sexist -- I mean, "It's rather sexist!"

Now we move onto gender in 'rithmetic.



The boy gets the correct answer, but dad makes an ambiguous statement...

So dad needs to explain female math.

"Particularly if he is married." Yuck it up, Byron.



Oh, and it all ends with a cute little story of the little woman besting "daddy". How quaint.

:snarl:

If you'd prefer to read the column in its entirety as it appeared: