Vintage Rhyming & Illustrated Hygiene Advice

Jane clears her nose,
into dainty silk
kerchief

Then wipes her
eye with same

And in 48 hours
an eye infection
made her sore and lame

Always Use paper Tissue For Your Nose And Discard It

From an old copy of Encyclopedia Of Medical Self-Help.

Used Hankies In Your Hair

Kitschy Kitschy Coo presents... The Hanky Bonnet: The ultimate in icky fashion recycling.



I don't care how much it's laundered, turning your bridal hankie into a christening bonnet for your baby is just asking for a bad case of cradle crap cap.

Inside McCall's Needlework & Crafts, Spring 1978 issue.

The Game Of Stickerchief

Found in The Book of Knowledge, Vol XL, The Game Of Stickerchief:

A splendid game that can be played by any number of children is "Stickerchief." It is quite as exciting as hockey or lawn-tennis, and it has the advantage of not requiring expensive balls, racquets, or sticks.

Stickerchief is played with a handkerchief and some short pieces of bamboo, of the sort used by gardeners to hold up tall flowers. A dozen of these bamboos can be bought at any florist's for one shilling.

One shilling? What am I, made of money?

Who compares hockey to lawn-tennis? Well, I might; I find neither "exciting."

Hankie History To Sneeze At?

In Modern Woman Magazine (Vol 14, No 5, 1945), a little snippet on hankies:

Historians credit Marie Antoinette with the invention of the pocket handkerchief. She was so broken up at leaving her home in Austria that she cried all the way to France and wiped her eyes with bits of lace torn from her dress and lingerie. Anticipating future tears, she made it a point always to have a piece of lace tucked in a pocket of her dress. This, say the historians, was how handkerchiefs were born.

I don't know if this is true, even if it is said that Marie-Antoinette made an observation that a square handkerchief is most convenient and pleasing, and so King Louis XVI published a decree ordering the new lengths.

In any case, because of this, I do not think it's right that we sneeze, tear, snot or otherwise 'goo' onto hankies with French motifs, including but not limited to, Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec, the Statue of Liberty, or French language.

You Know What They Say About Artists With Big Noses

Le blog de mister M is au Francais -- which is, along with a few swear words, about all I know in French (sorry, Mlle Pfister, my high school French teacher) -- so I do not know what he says about this art piece... But I'm pretty sure the "big nose" euphemism is internationally understood.

Milk-Mucus Connection Found

Doctors may say there's no connection between milk & mucus, but I think I've found one: Borden's Elsie the Cow on a hanky.

How About A Punch -- & Judy -- In The Nose

OK, so it may not be Punch & Judy, but still, it's blowing your nose on puppets. And kids.

Scrap Rug Fun - Doggy Tissue Cover

From the February, 1971, issue of Pack-O-Fun, instructions to make a doggie tissue box cover. (This is actually practical too because cutting up old rugs is sure to make you -- and others -- sneeze.)

Dimple Dot Kleenex Box Cover Kit

I never knew they had an official name.


Seeing this ad reminds me of when I was young, someone gave this to my folks as a gift -- :eek: -- and our dog used to bark at like she was rabid (the dog, not the Dimple Doll). My folks would put it away, and then every now and then bring it out to see if the dog still hated it; she did. Eventually, the dog got a hold of it and destroyed it.

Whenever I see them at sales, I want to buy them and set them all in a row on a shelf -- maybe even fill and entire book shelf with them, in all the colors and variations.

I did get one once, but sent it to my sister; one part memory, one part freak factor (she hates dolls so opening a box with a doll head, well, that would be super freaky). But no affordable ones since.

Feel free to send me some, if you don't want them.

Amanda Always Hated It When They Returned Her Hanky

Used.



Via LJ's Vintage Photo Community.

Feeling Sneezy? Put A Feather By Your Nose

Allergy lovers rejoice -- there's a vintage Tammis Keefe hanky to help you out. If the feathers (and c- roosters) don't set your nose a twitchin' the vintage hankie's sure to have some dust.

The Microbe: A Contagious Rag

Via University of Colorado Digital Sheet Music Collection.

Rockefeller Center and the Empire State Building: Architecture To Sneeze At

According to this vintage hanky, anyway.



Via Cemetarian.

Snotty French Tricks

The French are always up to something... Like this vintage hanky which has "Pour Le Rouge De Vos Levres" printed on it.



Pour Le Rouge De Vos Levres means, "For The Red Of Your Lips."

Yeah, put your lips to what I blew out of my nose here. No, no, it's fine. Would this sweet little kitten fool you?

When Clowns Scare The Snot Out Of People

I wouldn't have the nerve to bring a clown towards my face -- I usually shield myself from them because they scare the snot out of me. Which, in theory, means a clown hanky would hold, literally, a certain sense of poetic justice, right? But this one has "moveable bead eyes", which means it would be looking at me -- able to make eye contact even! :shudder:

Not to mention the pains of the whole nostril-to-eye dealio.

Snot Funny

Is it just me, or is the idea of blowing your nose on a snail yucky?


Naturally I have no problem blowing my nose on children. How many times have children -- not even just my own children -- covered me in their snot?


Meh. It's the circle of life.



(If those are, in fact, children -- they look like lawn gnomes come to life; hence their fear of garden snails, their sworn enemy.)

Vintage hanky via eBay.