Wednesday, May 27, 2009

I Can't Hear You; Your Makeup Is Too Loud

A 1965 Max Factor ad for Hi-Fi makeup. (Cosmo, February, 1965)

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Sunday, January 11, 2009

Using Peer Pressure To Hook Teens On Crossword Puzzles

The back cover of Scholastic's Crosswords for Teen Agers not only uses the "C'mon, join the crowd!" to push the crack of word games that is "crossword puzzles", but employs sexual dance euphemisms to lure the teens in:
Dozens of delightful puzzles

Tailored to your taste...and your tempo

Pick up speed as your do along:

Enjoy yourself with the "easies"


Mess around with the "mediums"


Tangle with the "toughies"

Crosswords for Teen Agers, by Murray Rockowitz, copyright 1958 (TAB Books, published by Scholastic), 6th printing, May 1963.

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Saturday, January 10, 2009

How To Talk To The Soda Jerk

From Calling All Girls, December, 1945.

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Thursday, November 13, 2008

"Don't You Know There's A Peace On?"

More lingo from the "Jabberwocky and Jive" column in Calling All Girls, December, 1945.

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Thursday, November 6, 2008

The Corn Is Green -- And 1945's Knee-Deep In It

In Calling All Girls (December, 1945), Nancy Pepper, Fashion Editor, has a kitschy column called "Jabberwocky and Jive". This bit is teaches the not-so-cool kids on the cool lingo the kids were using that day based on Hollywood.

Here are some of my favorites (you can click the image to read the larger scan).
B 'n B -- That's what you call them if they're Co-Starring of Going Steady, on account of they're a Bogie 'n Bacall.

HI, VAN--HOW'S JOHNSON? -- Instead of plain "Hi." There are lots of them -- like "Hi, Garson -- how's Pidgeon?"

HEAVENLY HURD -- A smooth boy. Inspired by the Man of your Screams in "Dorian Gray."

CROON ANOTHER, CROSBY -- Means "Tell me more."

THE CORN IS GREEN -- You say that when anyone tells a corny story.

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Monday, October 27, 2008

Never Too Much Gay Head

I had to drop another 50 cents, even when hubby thought we already had this -- because you can never have too much Gay Head.

Now, you may be thinking that Dear Gay Head: Letters from the Mail Box answered by Gay Head (aka Margaret Hauser) is just another silly out-dated etiquette book for teens. Well, it is. But that's precisely why I love it. Exhibit A:

Q. I wanted to ask a certain girl for a date, but when I talked to a couple of the fellows in the gang about her, they told me she's a "square." I hardly know her, since she's a grade behind me at school, but I still think she's cute. Would I be foolish to go ahead and ask her for a date anyway?

A. You'd be more foolish if you didn't ask her for a date! Changing your mind just because a couple of the fellows said she's a "square" isn't straight thinking at all. Besides, don't you like to make your own decisions?

Why did the other boys call this girl a "square"? Because she doesn't interest them? Because they heard it from someone else? Whatever their reasons, it doesn't necessarily follow that your opinion would be the same as theirs. The only fair way to judge a person is to get to know him or her for yourself.

"Labeling" people is a habit to avoid. Who has the right to say what's genuine and what's synthetic about another's personality? Everyone has good qualities and bad qualities; all individuals have different interests and characteristics. And people value their friends for different reasons, too.

Develop your own beliefs and opinions, and reject unfounded hand-me-downs. You'll not only avoid hurting others needlessly, but you'll gain new respect for yourself.
Amazingly hip, that Gay Head. Note the troublesome areas she blithely skipped as she seamlessly melded teen lingo and lecture so that those kids would really hear her. Not to mention the homosexual double entendres!

Describe your favorite Gay Head parts and maybe I'll toss an award your way.

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Thursday, February 21, 2008

The Date Line, 1957

Thirteen Points Along "The Date Line"

The Date Line: Facts & Fancies for the Girl in School, by Jan Landon, as it appeared in the November 1957 issue of Good Housekeeping.

#1 Boys in bottles.

Boys in bottles are a flash fad in Kansas... to get a pickled effect like this, girls back the picture with cardboard, brace them with clothes-hanger wire, and float them in colored water... others just paste glossy prints inside the bottle with rubber cement -- either way is pretty eerie while it lasts.
Ya think?Amazingly, the photo of a bottled-boy is credited to Dare Wright. (I have a huge crush on Dare Wright and her works-- so does Slippity-Do-Da.)

#2 All the, er, cool girls are doin' it...

That outgrown game, pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey, is roaring back in a new Southern version" "Pin-the-sideburn-on-Elvis." !.....
I wonder if it continued with fat-Elvis too? Girls in the south, who were learning to deep-fat-fry any and all foods, must have continued to love Fat Elvis, right?

#3 I don't think I've ever been so embarrassed to be from Wisconsin...

In Wisconsin they say the girl's "got him drafted" when the boy's hooked...
How cheesy.

#4 I'm beginning to suspect this groovy knowledge isn't for "the girl in school", but for her parents... Like some sort of "how to understand your teenager" and "learn the lingo" advice column.

"It's been a hunk of heaven, but I think I'll jump for earth," means the party, evening, or romance is over.
#5 Of course, every school girl wants to know how the ultra glam college girls are wearing their sweaters...

#6 For the cool girl in school, tips on making an autograph belt. Ingredients are as simple as the sideburn-pinning-girls are: a plain, wide leather belt and press-on gold-leaf.

Next they giveth, then taketh... A crafty idea and then an equally crafty insult.

#7 First a DIY tip for using clothesline rope, painted in bright enamel paint to make "un-run-of-the-mill" necklaces for "medallions". Take that crafty tip and choke on it.

#8 Don't like that insult? How about this insult then: "Your mother must have bought you with green stamps!" It is the latest insult. (It may seem weird for a ladies' magazine to give insult tips -- but what sort of person actually takes such advice?)

#9 This next one makes me feel better about being a cheesy Wisconsin girl; at least I'm not from Texas.
Every rooter pops a blown-up paper bag at the kick-off of special games at Amarillo High, Texas

#10 But still, Texas girls are less icky than these girls...
Right after the Chicopee High, Mass., teams wins a big game, girls beg boys for, of all things, the chin straps of their football helmets... straps are prized collectors' items, hung like trophies on bedroom walls.
Hey, don't say, "Of all things," because heaven knows a sweaty chin strap worn by a pimply lad is leagues better than other straps -- begged for or not.

#11 This next bit features "grab-bag evenings", heh heh. Oh wait -- it's not quite the snarky fun it sounds like... The 'grab-bags' aren't ugly girls after all.

"Grab-bag evenings" eliminate squables on group dates in St. Louis... instead of arguing about restaurants and movies, they put ads of all possible choices in two boxes, one for movies, one for restaurants -- everybody goes to the spots drawn by a blindfolded girl.
And that's how Muffy ended up blindfolded in the back of Dale's dad's Buick. Honest.

#12 Little black books weren't enough...

"Fix-up files" are made by Midwest girls to simplify arranging blind dates... they're wallet albums of their girl friends' pictures with statistics and interests listed on the back for the benefit of inquiring boys...
Those 1957 Midwest girls were slutty, pimping their friends; I feel even prouder now.

#13 More fashion advice you need to take -- like a slap in the face:

#14 Yup, a bonus.

An endearing twist in envelope inscriptions is being revived in the Midwest... on letters to girls, boys add a phrase above the address so that it reads like this:

Oh, how I
Miss Sandra Smith
64 Middlefield Rd.
etc., etc.,
Gawd, no wonder those boys needed help soliciting dates.

Then again, maybe that "Oh, how I" was code for something.

#15 Don't complain -- you need more tips on how to understand what your peers are saying to you:

"Face in the crowd" is new for someone who'll pass with a shove...
I need that translated, actually.
If you have "the rare disease," you haven't had a date for ages.
No comment. Hubby makes me keep this PG-13 and I think that line is rife with enough innuendo as it is.

Well, as the cook kids say, it's been a hunk of heaven but I think I'll jump for earth now.

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