Normally I cherish anything that reminds me of my childhood or some other overly romanticized period of my liking. However there are some things that I would rather never see again. Listed here.

1) Tandem bicycles. Nobody ever looked cool riding one of these beasts. I think they where targeted for older folks. The bicycle manufactures must have felt that it takes two Geritol popping dudes to propel a bicycle forward. Popping a wheelie was totally out of the question.

2) Gas station attendants that wore skinny little hats as part of their uniform. I don't know about you but I really don't want someone pumping my gas who is better dressed than I am. OK they can have a shirt with a name on it but hell, a matching hat! Once on a trip to New Hampshire my uncle had an argument with one of these dudes, something about needing so much gasoline to get a free drinking glass. My uncle stormed to the car, stopped and turned to the attendant. You know what he did? He told that guy to take a shit in his skinny little hat!! Very poetic.

3) Truss or any other hernia device. See back in the old days you only had surgery under the most dire of circumstances. The nurse would spin the wheel of fortune to determine how much anesthesia to give. Too much, you never wake up...not enough you feel the burn. So, one could live with a hernia, couldn't one? So what if a man has to wear a garter belt to keeps his nuts from migrating to his stomach. Buck up.

4) Anything ending in the words O-RAMA. Bowl-o-rama; shop-o-rama; skate-o-rama; chicken-in-a-basket-o-rama. I don't know the etymology of this term and I'm not sure that it even has one. I see a Don Rickles type seedy businessman in 1951 sitting at his government surplus desk, chomping on a 'gar, thinking of a name for his new used car business. He muses...Icheatya Auto, nah.Pretty Good Auto, nah. And in a flash of inspiration...Cars-O-Rama. The sign goes up and soon after that every person starting a new business adopts the O-Rama suffix. English as she is spoke.

5) Predictions of the future, especially from the 1930's. Actually I love these because they are the height of optimism and hubris, a certain recipe for failure. Often found in popular magazines these prognosticators of the future had this to say. By 1960 the deserts of the world will be irrigated by desalinated seawater and hunger will be eradicated. In the 1970's men and woman will dress alike (well they where bound to get one right). By the 1980's robots will do all our work for us (and presumably pick up our unemployment checks on their way home from work). By the 1990's all disease's will be cured, except for the common cold. And my all time favorite. In the year 2000 people will live in glass bubbles in colonies under the sea. So far it's just been Michael Jackson.

6) The name Millie. Sorry